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This is my first post for A toZ challenge and here I begin my journey with theme “parenting tips for first four years of motherhood. So today i am writing about Alphabet A – ANXIETY IN NEW MUMS.
Motherhood brings along with all sorts of emotions, such as joy, anxiety and fear. The emotions are overwhelming. Whether it is the happiness of being a new mom or the anxiety of dealing with the baby issues the first time or the fear of doing anything wrong. Like any other mother, I too went through these emotions. There were many questions in mind that bothered and fear of harming the delicate little one is just unexplainable. The anxiety overwhelms you more after a few weeks. All you need is to address the issues at hand, one by one.
Here are some of the issues that bothered me then:
1)Is this the right way to do things?
Since I dealt with the issues for the first time in life and the responsibility of doing it right was immense, I always in a dilemma. Many a times decisions had to be taken immediately and I had no idea to know if the decisions were right. Besides, there were many other things that troubled me. Whether to co-sleeping or make the child sleep in a cot? Breastfeed or formula feeding? Feed on demand or schedule the feed? Should I let my baby cry or wake up as many times as needed? When to wean? Are these nappies size okay? How can I understand whether she is tired? Is he feeling too hot or too cold? What can be the right water temperature for a bath, does he need a cold-water bath or a hot one? list is endless.
2)I hope there is no abnormality in my child!
I was really worried about this. I would keep checking google if she is able to hear properly? Is she reaching her milestones on time? Is she gaining enough weight?
3)Always judging my mom-skills and feeling guilty about it: I used to constantly worried at that do I give enough time to her and Do I read enough books to her? Am I handling her tantrums correctly? If my parenting style is right or not ? Am I a good enough mom for her?
Just know these six corresponding truths about motherhood that would help you combat anxious thoughts
1)whenever you think, “Is this the right way to do things?”, just remember.
There are no such set rules to do anything . Take conscious decision
2) whenever you think, “is there any abnormality in my child?”, just remember
Trust your mother’s intuition. When in doubt, consult a trusted medical professional. And stay off of Dr Google. That’s quite a recipe for disaster every time!
3. Instead of experiencing any guilt, just remember,
You are enough and doing your best
4. Instead of comparing yourself to others, remember…
Keep your eyes and ears turned inward.
After giving birth your Focus has to be on activities that really matter, that is, your health and your kid’s overall well being. Don’t get too involved in the life of social media, because it’s never the way it’s shown!
Do remember that seeking validation from people out there will just lower your self-esteem. Each parent has their own parenting style, and if yours differs from theirs, it surely does not dictate how good of a parent you are.